when the poison ground returns

when it returns

no friend, however loyal, can see where i speak from

or where i came from.

shame and guilt,

feelings i will not explain

lest i grab hold of their poison

and drink it down.

fear that i will have to stop therapy

has followed me around for 2 weeks.

i left it alone as long as it was

a mile behind me.

my mistake——

because now its holding my fork

as i sit down for supper

and hands me my brush in the morning.

this would be funny,

but i know where it has taken me before

and i will not go back.

i will have a voice

so that the poison ground cannot rise

to take me down.

mpowers 6/30/2019

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go wild

go wild

be wild

sleep in the wild without a blanket

a rock for your pillow

and the moss as your bed.

go wild

be wild

rest in the wild, sleeping under the moon

and howling at the first whiff

of the damp night air.

go wild

play wild

the sticks become your saber

cutting through muck and mire

the woods your incubator with its smells

and light, its dirt

and rotting leaves waking up the rawness

the world has lulled to sleep.

go wild

be wild

breathe wild

opening your lungs to suck it in

the sweetness of quiet air

pulling in the peace

to meet the peace living within you…

hidden, yet wild still.

urge its wildness awake into your heart

every cell of your being.

go wild, be wild, breathe wild, live wild.

untitled

i know you feel fear and anger

loneliness and sadness

and hating everything and everyone—

i am here to tell you i love you……

you are enough.

you are the universe and the stars and the sky

that holds the stars.

you may not believe it

and yet i know you need to hear it,

feel it and embody it.

hang onto the desire to be free

to know freedom at its deepest level.

hang onto the letting go

of all the mind messages that bombard you.

you are more than this–

you are even more than the letting go!

mpowers 6/12

how it appears

fearful thus angry

lonely and sad

forgetful therefore anxious

too absorbed in why

these days have been so challenging

instead of truly being present

its too scary to be present

and invite it all in

tired of the shit

tired of doing the work

i dont always understand

floundering like a fish on the pier

trying to get back home

into the safety of water

that surrounds it

comforts it

breathes it

sustains it

knowing, but not knowing

lost, but not lost

wavering, but

insisting on standing stubbornly still

in the middle of what

is not working

its all i know

and it will not let me go.

mpowers 6/12

free

in this moment i am free

no ideas or concepts of being loved

or not being loved can hinder or bind me

i am free in this moment

there is no thing that binds me

no word

no attitude

no religious rant

no person trying to fix me

(as if i am broken)

no job or lack of job

no thoughts of abandonment

no judging of my emotions

no giving myself away

in hopes they will like me…..

i am free.

mpowers 6/8

what matters

it doesn’t matter to me

what you think of me

what matters is

do you cry your own tears

feel your own pain

do you look for your own solution

do you touch the heart of nature

everyday

do you listen for the song

that lives in your own heart….

what matters to me is

do you matter to yourself.

mpowers 1/30